Privileged kids glean invaluable lessons through volunteer work: Opportunities for giving abound In Calgary

Privileged kids glean invaluable lessons through volunteer work: Opportunities for giving abound in Calgary

Calgary Herald Monday, October 30, 2006 Page: D3 Section:

Real Life Byline: Lisa Murphy-Lamb Source: For The Calgary Herald

My husband and I have often said we arguably live on the best street, in the best neighbourhood, in the best city, in the best province, in the best country of the world.
We feel so blessed to be raising our children in the location we do. Add to that peace of mind, my husband's dynamic and steady job, our boys' good health, my freedom to work from home and our situation to enjoy life without many worries, and we are one very fortunate family.

Certainly our children are growing up in different circumstances than my husband or I did. While neither of us were impoverished, we didn't have the sense that the world was ours for the asking. Neither set of parents could buy us the small trinket each time we went to the store. Downhill skiing? I went the first time in high school when I could afford the lift ticket and got hand-me-down skis from a friend. I travelled Europe after high school. Four years of part-time work paid my way as well as my university tuition when I returned.

Our two sons, just six and nine, have been to Europe twice. They had their first taste of downhill skiing last year. RESPs will pay their university tuition. Restaurant meals, hotel stays in establishments more posh than my few childhood memories of Motel 6, and enough sports equipment to outfit all their varying passions are part of their world.

But within our cozy neighbourhood travel the less fortunate who search the back lanes for recyclables. They offer a daily reminder how life can turn on a dime given the wrong set of circumstances or choices, illness or lost dreams. These people strengthen my resolve to avoid raising my children in a culture of consumerism -- that I don't ever want to hear a sentence begin with "I deserve . . ." come from their lips when they feel put out.

But how do I teach my boys to appreciate what they have when they know no other life? How do I raise them to be not only thankful for their opportunities, but to share with others? In short, how do I raise a conscientious child in a world that largely offers them comforts?

Telling my boys how good they have it is only so effective. They have to experience this for themselves. One way to give children the opportunity to experience life outside their own is through volunteering as a family. Not only does volunteering together strengthen family ties, communication, values and goals, it helps children (and adults) develop as more caring, socially responsible, respectful human beings.

As a family, we have tried different ways to volunteer. Twelve years ago, my husband and I opted to become legal guardians to a young man with a disability who had grown up without a family. But 'Uncle Darrell' is so much more than a volunteer experience. His presence in our lives is profound. He has taught us the worth of human beings who are routinely marginalized. The fear of disabilities is diminished within our boys as he has taught them that he is so much more than his label 'disabled,' and that being disabled is not a bad thing.

Our boys have also volunteered in the river cleanup, around their own neighbourhood by raking leaves and shovelling snow for those who might need a hand and even in their classrooms.
Working with a student who needs extra help, in our household, is viewed as a community responsibility, not as an opportunity for the teacher to share her workload.

But there are many more exciting, helpful and life-altering volunteer experiences out there waiting for us to explore. From building animal shelters to wrapping holiday gifts, there are hundreds of exciting, new and giving opportunities just waiting to be filled by people young and old.

Volunteer Calgary, which is made of over 430 organizations that need volunteers to complete their work, has been working in the community since 1955. It suggests some simple steps to identify how families can get involved.

First, as a family, brainstorm the issues that are important (eg., poverty, education). Then list the top three and identify how your family wants to make a difference within those areas. Consider the time you have to commit and the distance you want to travel (there are even opportunities that can be fulfilled from home).

Training managers at Volunteer Calgary offer one-on-one consultation for families who want help finding the right volunteer experience.

I wouldn't want hardship to befall my sons. And I am so thankful that each night I can tuck them into bed knowing they are not hungry or cold or hurt. But I don't want to forget -- or have them forget -- that our situation is only shared by a privileged minority in our world.

We have the energy and time to give. More importantly, we have the obligation to give. And what we receive in return is the opportunity to pass on the sense of morality, values and social responsibility which is so crucial for our society to endure, both in the good times and the bad.

- Contact Volunteer Calgary through their website, volunteercalgary.ab.ca, or by calling 265-5633.

Lisa Murphy-Lamb is a Calgary-based writer and educator. She has two sons.

Illustration:• Graphic: Pierre Lamielle, Calgary Herald / (See hard copy for graphic).
Idnumber: 200610300003 Edition: Final Story Type: News Length: 886 words Illustration Type: Graphic, Diagram